Most little girls grow up dreaming of someday marrying their Prince Charming and becoming mothers. Some even have the specific number of boys and girls they want laid out in their life plan along with their names already picked out. The point is—most kids grow up wanting to become parents at some point in their lives. What happens when a career takes top priority? Especially a career in the entertainment industry where being attractive, flexible, and available are key to success.
Is it possible to still become a parent after first having established career security? That depends. Most medical experts recommend childbearing before age 35—the age at which the risk of genetic and chromosomal abnormalities in babies greatly increases. For example, according to the American College of Obstetrics and Gynecologists (ACOG) by age 35, a woman’s risk of conceiving a child with Down Syndrome or another chromosomal abnormality is 1 in 200. By age 45, the risk is 1 in 35. For those under age 35, the general risk is 1 in 800. Surely, you can see the cause for concern for “older” mothers.
Still, the statistics have not stopped women from choosing motherhood. According to the U.S. Census Bureau (2010), 81% of women (age 15-44) in the U.S. become mothers. The average age for first-time mothers is 25.4 years. However, even at older ages women, including celebrities, are choosing motherhood, although some do opt for adoption instead of natural childbirth. Jennifer Aniston, Tina Fey, and Halle Berry are amongst the celebrities over 40 giving birth naturally. Those who have adopted include Calista Flockhart, Jodie Foster, Sheryl Crow, Sandra Bullock, and Nia Vardalos.
Having a partner or spouse doesn’t even have to be a part of the equation. In fact, An Associated Press poll of people under 50 found that more than 2 in 5 unmarried women without children (or 42 percent), would consider having a child on their own without a partner, including more than a third (or 37 percent) who would consider adopting solo. Most women who do become mothers make their way back into the labor force fairly quickly after giving birth. Statistics show that 62.1% of women age 16 to 50 who had a birth in the past 12 months were in the labor force.
What does having a baby do to a woman’s career? Several things are clear: First, most women desire motherhood; Second, Being married or having a partner is not the first priority in choosing motherhood; Third, and arguably most importantly, you can have both and many women do!
Choosing a career does not have to mean remaining childless. Will it be more difficult to establish or maintain a career once you are a parent? It probably will be more challenging, but having a support system of family, friends, quality childcare, and other resources does make it easier. The joys of parenthood also make life more rewarding and meaningful. Ultimately, opting for parenthood is a very personal choice. It’s not for everyone, but if you do choose it, know that it does not have to mean the end of your career.
I interviewed three actresses in their early 40s who are not mothers and all three of them stated that their biggest regret in life was not having had children because they chose their acting careers as their top priority. I also interviewed two actresses who are mothers and both agreed that motherhood is by far the more rewarding of the two. Whatever, your choice, be confident that it was the right one for you and make the most of it.