3 months in to project “Make acting sexy again” and I’ve hit a low point. Now for me, the idea of actually quitting acting is never on the table…my brain and my heart don’t view that as a rational choice. It’s never going to be an option the same way deciding to stop breathing is never going to be an option. However, there are days when that knowledge is the only bright spot when it comes to my career. While I am ok living in the place of “today is not the day I quit”…it’s not fun and it’s not always healthy. For me there is no plan B re: leaving this career but sometimes I need to pretend like there is. So in true Rory Gilmore fashion, after having one such down stretch, I made a Pro/Con list.
Here is part of my list:
Weirdly it was a lot easier to make the con portion of this list because the pro side was so obvious to me that spelling out the multitude of different ways that acting was the “right” choice seemed liked overkill.
However, it was really good to air the stuff that’s not great and kind of give that negativity a voice so I could then let it go. Acknowledging that the thing that brings me joy and gives me purpose isn’t always great in the day-to-day is incredibly freeing and empowering.
At the end of a particularly down day though, this still wasn’t enough. I remembered being in a class where the special guest was Crista Flanagan and she was talking career highs and lows. In particular, she mentioned a time when she was thinking of quitting and sort of hitting her head on the wall because she had tried everything and her career was stalled. So she made a list of every way she had ever heard to “break in” or just move your career forward and then she decided that before she was allowed to consider quitting, she had to try everything on that list.
Naturally, I decided to make my own list. I thought that this could be a great exercise in seeing where there was still room to improve and also discover new things that could help me expand as an artist.
Here’s a portion of my list:
I would love to hear from you guys on ideas for other things to try or suggestions on what you do when you hit one of those down places to pick yourself back up. Until next time, I’ll be here focusing on the “it’s a marathon not a sprint” aspect of it all…
– Anna