Great Expectations

0

I have a love-hate relationship with expectations, as I imagine many actors do.

As a competitive person, expectations are a large part of what prompts me to set challenging goals for myself, and then also what drives me to achieve them. I expect a lot from myself, and I’m motivated to put those expectations into effect. I see this as a hugely powerful force in my life, and a tool I use to help me push myself through periods of my life when things seem stagnant. Expecting great things from myself and my team helps me put choices into perspective, and keeps me on track when deciding where to put my resources and energies.

But when left unchecked, expectations can have a decidedly negative impact on my life, as well. If having ambitious goals for myself and my career is a positive force (and I believe that it is, for the most part), then allowing those same goals to sour from aspirant to lofty can have devastating effects. Goals which are too far out of reach–or which cannot realistically be achieved with the resources on hand (e.g. you’d have to win the lottery, or their achievement is predicated mostly or entirely on the actions of others) can thoroughly spoil the experience of the life you are actually, currently living. After all, what’s the point of working towards booking a webseries if you’re not driving the Audi S5 or competing for that Oscar.

Atrophy through preemptive disappointment is a very real thing. I’ve seen it more often than I’d like in this business. Goals are too far out of reach, too big, and–perhaps most damningly–too specific, and therefore all other achievements seem too small and inconsequential to be counted as achievements. And then, eventually, the whole career becomes some combination of impossible and unsatisfying, and is discarded.

Now, this isn’t always the way it goes, not by any stretch. After all, the line between ambitious and lofty is different for each individual–but there is a significant population of striving actors in Los Angeles, for whom the disparity between what they want and what is, is simply too much. They end up working at a job rather than their career and then eventually phasing out not because they couldn’t cut it with talent, but because of the magnitude of their own metrics for success and their inability to parse that into more manageable goals.

And then there are the expectations of others, which can cause some serious damage to our careers and psyche if not properly managed. For me, it’s these outside expectations–both the imagined and the real–that trip me up the most. If my ambitions are what push me to succeed, my anxieties about the expectations of others almost inevitably hold me back.

In the realm of the rational, expectations are a very real, near-tangible thing that actors encounter nearly every day. Every character breakdown we receive lays out specifications for the actors general appearance, demeanor, character foundation, even their measurements and cadence or dialect. These are, at base, very real expectations for the actor going into a specific audition–and their starkness is often the basis for equally real anxiety that we will not measure up to those metrics. After all, going in for a part that MUST BE BRUNETTE BETWEEN 5’6-5’8 when you are dirty blonde or 5’2 leaves one feeling behind the curve from the outset. You are literally a different person than what Casting has expressed that they wanted–but barring throwing the audition, you must still go in and give your best interpretation of the character in the hopes of altering their expectations, or at least booking the room.

On the imagined front, branding erects yet another set of expectations with which the actor must contend; your headshots, social media, past work or reel, age, physical appearance and training sets out a certain set of impressions about who you are as an actor, and these precede you into the audition room. In many cases, they are the reason you were called in to audition, and they are often the reason why you were not. Knowing these presumed attributes is a valuable talent–it can appreciably increase the amount of work you book when you know what to submit for, and what image you project as an actor and a product. But the assumption that casting must want you because of these attributes limits your choices when preparing material, pushing you to discard bolder or unconventional choices in an effort (usually futile) to be what Casting or Production wants.

Taken together, these real and imagined expectations carry the potential to become insurmountable. But it is crucial not to fall into the trap of impossibility. After all, while it is impossible to meet an unattainable standard, the expectations of others (Casting Directors, Producers, Directors, the broader Entertainment community) are not actually that–they are in fact not any standard at all. They are, instead, wholly unknown. And that, friends, can be conquered.

Take, for example, those outside expectations that are real–the laundry list of attributes and qualities that the CD, network, etc. explicitly lays down before the audition. What to do when they’re not a perfect fit–hell, when they don’t fit at all, or they do, but they’re not all you want to show? Consider them not the standard, but rather the template: an opportunity for you to be more than the breakdown prescribes. Don’t give in to defeat before you’ve even gone in–you honestly never know. They may have said blonde because they wanted “midwestern” or “flower child” or “air-headed” or “conservative.” But who says you can’t embody any one of those things as a redhead? A brunette?

Case in point: I was recently called in for a small co-star role on a new show on USA; the breakdown described someone “extremely attractive” and professional, but young. Form-fitting office outfit with heels. This is not what I generally go out for. Though I can play mid-twenties, I usually go in for college aged and I’m charactery and have a slightly vintage look; I’m curvy and not-quite-five-feet, and though I’m pretty enough for the real world, in TV terms, I generally get called in for the best friend, rather than the attractive lead or the mean girl. Nonetheless, I aimed to book the room–and to be the most attractive, efficient, savvy secretary I could be: my version of this character.

And I booked it. Because I didn’t allow my fear of not matching their expectations to stop me from doing my job, from going in and giving a solid audition.

The same holds true for those imagined outside expectations; our brand is only as truthful as we allow it to be, and by that same token, it is only limiting if we invest in limitations. Yes, our marketing may tell one story–that we are a girl-next-door, or a comedian, or the funny Dad, or the cop. But who’s to say that our branding is everything? In this age of self-production, there’s no reason your social media branding can’t show a different color or set of colors that runs parallel to your conventional hard-copy marketing. Make a web-short, do stand-up, write funny tweets, do a series of dramatic vintage glamour shots–shake up your brand to show that you have range. Bring a three-dimensional portrait of yourself to the digital marketplace, and learn scenes and audition material that is contrary to your typical “type” so that Casting Directors can engage with that other version of you, as well. Change the expectations you imagine the Industry has of you–expand them. Refuse to be neatly defined, and work to excel at a number of colors and genres of work, rather than recusing yourself to the most convenient type.

In sum, don’t be safe, and don’t dwell in fear of what you can’t control, and can’t know. The expectation game can only be won when you reject impossibility all together, and supplant it with challenge. Invigorate your career by embracing the goal of exceeding or exploding expectations, and then all expectations in your path become positives, rather than hindrances. And while I know that embracing what Brian Tracy calls an “attitude of positive expectation” isn’t always the easiest path–and often seems counter-intuitive in the face of very real life problems–it does keep you in the game. And that, ultimately, is the only way to achieve success.

“High achievement always takes place in the framework of high expectation.” –Charles Kettering, a guy who knew from success. Dream big, hustle on. Let’s do this.