As someone who thinks of herself as a strong, opinionated, passionate person… I find myself giving advice a lot. When I write my articles, I’m usually full of what I hope are helpful thoughts, they do not always apply to everybody in every situation but I try to give solid advice. Well… this time…I am feeling a bit more thoughtful and curious. I find myself in a place where I do not have all the answers.
I am pregnant. Yep…there I am putting it out there. I am overjoyed, excited, happy beyond belief and completely bonded to my baby. Am I scared and in a state of shock even though this was planned? Yes I am. It took a long time to feel real, and I still haven’t quite come to terms with finding my work/family balance.
My career is very important to me I enjoy what I do and I do not want to let that go. I want to keep creating and working with others who are also passionate about creating. I want to work for myself and my family. You might be thinking I am coming off a bit selfish here, I am not saying I am not going to make my baby a priority, I am. I’m working on figuring out what my steps are for my future and my family’s future.
We work in an industry with lots of long days and possible travel. We get called for last minute meetings across town and sometimes get called to work in eight hours. As a woman with a husband who also works in this business our hours can be pretty weird. This could be a difficult thing to try to work a baby into.
Also, as a woman who tries to stand up for all women making strides in our field of work, it can be hard to tell coworkers you are pregnant. The reactions have been across the board, most people have been excited and very encouraging when I tell them. Others, not so much. A lot of people have reacted towards me like now that I will be a mother that I can no longer work in this industry, like I am voluntarily quitting. I have gotten looks of sympathy, like having a baby is a bad thing, like wanting to have a baby is a sign of some sort of weakness and that there is no way I can have a baby and work in production.
I am publishing it here… YOU ARE WRONG. It is my choice to have a baby and I am doing it… just like I have done everything else to get me to where I am in my life. I will also use this same determination to continue the onward and upward journey of my career. Will I make mistakes? Yes. Will I have moments where I think it would be easier to not have to take my kiddo to daycare? Yes. Will I struggle and probably cry? Yes. Will I love my baby as much as I possibly can? Yes. Will I continue creating? You can be sure of it. Is this a “set back” as some people have called it? No, this is my life and I choose to be a woman who is passionate about her work and her family.
So, now I ask you… are you a mom? Are you continuing to work? If not, I would love to hear what lead you to that decision, if you are, I would love to get your thoughts on finding the balance. Are you in a similar place, where you are maybe thinking having kids might be in your future but are curious what life brings? I would love to hear from you.
I am hoping that by posting what I think is a very honest and open letter, I am helping someone else to know they are not alone. Today, I do not have advice for you, but I do have an open ear. I would love the readers of Ms. In the Biz’s thoughts about finding the balance between working in our industry and having a family.